in the wee hours of the night pondering what the lesson is in all this, the last yr of my life. am i happy? yes! have the pain, tears & heartache been without reward? no, i have reaped so many benefits from this, even if it doesn't feel like it at times- i know in my heart i have. i am happy (most days), content and free. i am myself again, and that is an amazing feeling. it's been quiet the journey back to discovering myself again. funny the things you promise or barter with the spirits out there if you could only crawl back into yourself- maybe a little bruised and banged up, but not broken. i will never give up who i am again or allow someone to tear me down & strip me of who i am to fit 'their' mold. nothing is that important that you need to lose yourself for another. there is always compromise, flexibility and mtg halfway. ppl can't change ppl, just accept & love them as they are- that is all anyone can ask. to be loved, cared for, accepted for who they truly are unconditionally.
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there's a reason i said i'd be happy alone.
it wasn't cause i thought i'd be happy alone.
it was because i thought if i loved someone,
and then it fell apart...
i might not make it.
it's easier to be alone
because what if you learn that you need love,
and then you don't have it.
what if you like it and lean on it
what if you shape your life around it
and then it falls apart...
or does it?
-Unknown
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